Torch Articles

The Music Department at First Church is pleased to host an evening recital of British Humorous Music on November 14th at 7:30 pm in the sanctuary. Longtime musical friend, Baritone Keith Trickett, will offer his musical musings at this benefit recital for The Homeless Youth Shelter. Keith's recitals are always a pleasure and this one is sure to be a special delight. Joined by accompanist Emily Williams, this will be an entertaining and worthwhile evening. Please come !!!

A Suggested Donation of $10 will gratefully be accepted at the door, and following the recital a full reception will be held in Eliot Hall. If you have questions, please feel free to contact David Owens 801-390-0488

UU Orientation New or new-ish to Unitarian Universalism or First Unitarian Church? Curious about how to get connected with this community of service, learning and justice? Join staff and lay leaders in an intimate evening of questions and exploration. Next First Church Info Session/UU Orientation - Monday, October 24th - 6:30-8:30 in Eliot Hall.
Light snacks will be provided and childcare is available upon request. Please register online here  or contact Rev. Matthew. Please include number and ages of children attending in the form. For more info, contact Consulting Minister for Congregational Life, the Rev. Matthew Cockrum, at or 801.582.8687 ext. 205.

Seeking the Sources Join Rev. Matthew Cockrum in an exploration of the Sources and Principles of Unitarian Universalism. This is a monthly drop-in class. Come to one, a few or all! Each session will include movement, meditation and conversation. If you’ve got a favorite yoga mat or meditation cushion bring it along…or just come as you are! Sessions will be the last Monday of the month unless it’s a holiday, in which case it will be on the prior Monday. Time: 6:45-8:45; Location: Little Chapel; Next session: October 31st.

Upcoming RE Events:

Do you own a sewing machine? Have we got a volunteer job for you! Are you willing to donate an hour or two for a simple sewing project that will help our homeless teen friends for whom we’re providing meals this year? If you can help, please contact Lissa Lander within the next few days to learn about making cloth bags for homeless teens. Email: . Project completion date 11/7/16.

We need to make dough to raise dough! The third Sunday of each month—Sandwich Sunday—RE classrooms at the 11am service make a lunch that we bring to the Volunteers of America Teen Shelter. We need a volunteer who will stand by the RE kitchen to monitor baking and monitor the cookie sale during Coffee Hour after service. Remember, this is only one Sunday each month. All proceeds from our cookie sales support our effort to replenish supplies for Sandwich Sundays (third Sunday of each month). If you’re willing to help, please contact Julie Miller or Lissa Lander at or .

Clothing Drive
 Over the UEA weekend, RE youth are decorating and assembling boxes for an upcoming clothing drive for two projects. First, we hope to collect stylish outfits for teens or baby clothes for teen moms who reside in the VOA shelter. Second, we would like to offer high-quality clothes at a very low cost to our own congregation. Funds raised from this project will go toward expenses associated with sending our teens to New Orleans next Spring on a service project. Clothing donations will be accepted during the Halloween Party on October 25, on Sunday October 30 and Sunday November 6. During Family Night on Monday November 7, we will lay clothes out for our families for $1/item. Any remaining clothing will be donated to the VOA teen shelter.

Halloween Party 
Calling all families with young children! Please join us for a ghoulishly good time Tuesday, October 25 from 6-7:30pm at Eliot Hall. More details here.

High School Recycling Fundraiser

-submitted by Nancy Moos

The High School YRUU youth are partnering with Planet Green to recycle e-waste! For each of the following items that we mail in, Planet Green gives a certain amount to our youth group. You get to be rid of your e-waste, and support our youth at the same time! Below is a list of items that can be recycled. Please bring only items that are on the list to the box near the Environmental Ministry table on Sundays, we’ll do the rest! In addition, if you’re looking to buy ink cartridges, you can buy them from Planet Green and we get a percentage! Just go to this website: planetgreenrecycle.com/slcyruu
What We Recycle:
· Inkjet Cartridges
· Laser/Toner Cartridges
· Cell Phones & Accessories
· GPS & Radar Detectors
· Calculators
· eBook Readers
· iPods/MP3 Players
· Digital/Video Cameras
· PDAs
· iPads/Tablets
· Video Game & Consoles
Questions? Contact Nancy Moos at

Traditions - Julie Miller, Director of Religious Education

Before I came to First Church, I heard a joke:
Q: What’s a Unitarian? A: An atheist with children!

A grain of truth here? I’m pretty certain I’m not the only one who arrived at a Unitarian Universalist church after never belonging to any church my entire adult life. When my son was quite young, I went church shopping. I wanted to raise him in a religious tradition, but the one I had attended didn’t make much sense to me.

The good news about being a UU is also the bad news. We have enormous freedom in how we practice our beliefs. None of us would have it any other way, right? Confession: I’m a bit shaky with this freedom.
So how does this affect my position as Religious Education Director for our youngest members? RE Assistant Lissa Lander and I often discuss how to incorporate our Seven Principles into daily, weekly and family traditions. I find myself thinking about those traditions most intently at this time of year, with the holidays just around the corner.

The reality is, times have changed dramatically since I was a kid. How do we create simple but fun, practical and lasting traditions for our families? Here’s where I’m coming from: rituals are not just for special occasions. They’re for every day. Just about anything families deliberately do together—as long as those “things” are juiced up and elevated beyond “routine”—could be called a family ritual.
Years ago, my son & I went out for ice cream every Friday afternoon after school. It was our way of celebrating, “Welcome to the Weekend Party .”

Comfort and security are two of the most important benefits of ritual, especially with young children. Next to your typical celebrations (birthdays, holidays, sports events), rituals help kids with transitions. Take bedtime, for example, when rituals are all about helping children switch from active to relaxed before falling off to sleep.

Rituals can strengthen the family structure. Like making dinner, for example. Everyone gets to pitch in. Simple tasks for younger children, larger tasks for the older kids. With seven guiding principles and seven days in the week, you could tie one principle to each day. Suppose you say grace before a meal. Focus on just one principle at the start of the meal with a phrase influenced by the lighting of the chalice: “Dear God, please give us open minds, loving hearts and helping hands this week.”

There are rituals for life’s milestones, for remembrances, for new beginnings. A ritual doesn’t have to be a fancy event. It emerges from the concept of purpose. First you figure out your purpose, then you imagine creative ways to introduce a ritual to suit your unique family.

Afraid my granddaughter would eat vast amounts of Halloween candy, I asked her to share with kids too poor to trick or treat. I assured her the candy would be replaced with a special book of her choosing. I also told her the tooth fairy wouldn’t pay for teeth riddled with cavities!

I read about a family that started a generational tablecloth ritual at Thanksgiving. Everyone at the dinner table signed his/her name on the cloth. Their grandmother embroidered over the signatures in a different color for each passing year.

A refugee family I knew prepared sweet potatoes for every special meal during the year because it was all they had to eat for one war-torn year. The sweet potatoes reminded them how thankful they were to be living in a safe land with bountiful food.

So, to sum up...every time you create a tradition with your children, you are giving them a template for enduring rituals that are the foundation for celebrations both large and small.

Reverendly Yours - Rev. Tom Goldsmith

Locker room talk is now a euphemism for degrading and objectifying women. The assumption rests on the idea that all guys participate in this conversation on either conquering women sexually or intending to do so. Even the Republican candidate running for president is not immune from such aggression towards women because, after all, he’s only a guy. It’s in the male DNA. Many believe that to be true.

We have devolved considerably since Jimmy Carter confessed (on a hot mic) having lust in his heart. He felt shame, and everyone had sympathy for poor Roselyn. But our exposure today to the course and vile view of women as objects to be groped at will, threatens to undermine every woman’s battle to achieve equality in our nation. Misogyny has been exemplified by a man vying for the White House.

But Trump’s problem is not misogyny as much as it is narcissism. The foremost characteristic of narcissists is grandiosity. The narcissist is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success in personal life, exaggerating one’s achievements and talents. The narcissist expects to be recognized as superior. The candidate running for the highest office in the land has a mental disorder. His continuous reference to his own brilliance, dismissal of challenges against him as part of a conspiracy, and his sexual conquests (mostly unwanted), offer a textbook example of a man living in his own fantasy world. The consequences of handing him the most powerful leadership seat in the world raises deep concerns. Our fleeing to Canada would not offer the escape sought from his illness.

As we now muddle through a new understanding of locker room talk, sexual predatory behavior, and definitions of masculinity, a little known college football coach is unwittingly providing a response to Trump’s sexism. Coach Tom Herman, who heads the University of Houston’s surprisingly successful football team, offers a new perspective on what goes on in the locker room. As player arrives for the game, the coach kisses them on the cheek. Of all the manly rituals one expects in this brutal game, kissing all the players sends a new message. It may be THE antidote to Trumpism.

How does Coach Herman account for such unorthodox behavior? In his second year of coaching, he says he has tremendous affection for all his players. The players say: If that gets us to win games, ok. And if we want to stay in the arena of mental diagnoses, psychologists praise the coach for his “frank articulation and emotion. He’s disrupting a stereotype about boys and men, a notion of masculinity that says boys and men are driven by the desire for competition and autonomy…all the research shows that humans are actually driven by the desire to be in connected communities.”

Our election this year is really about either tearing people apart or connecting with communities. Even in the den of highly charged testosterone, the locker room itself, men strive to show affection, brotherhood, and love. Leave behind the old myths about boys being boys in their conquest of women. Not true. It’s really about expressing their bonds of affection with each other. TRG

“In the Spotlight”. . . Meet Nicholas Shifrar

Tell us about yourself/your family: I'm a new UU. Signed the book last year. Good ol' Joseph B Herring brought me to the First U in fall 2015. After Rev. Tom G's sermon on the social gospel and hearing about this socially progressive congregation that includes Tim DeChristopher and Victoria Sethunya, I thought I might just make this place my home. I'm born and raised in Salt Lake City. I've been ready to get out for the last two years. Grad school is my next ticket. Look out Boston, Berkeley, or Chicago.

Where you grew up, what you did/do for a living, your hobbies, and interests:
 I'm a poet at heart. My mother is one of my heroes. She's a nurse practitioner with a big heart. My dad is an asshole- that's a term of endearment. I love him too. He thinks the same of me and I suppose those are our prerogatives. We're flawed bipeds learning to love. 
I've spent most of my professional life in service at hospitals. Mostly I've worked as a Psychiatric Technician at the Neuropsychiatric Inst. Right now I'm split between the food industry and working in an addiction recovery center. I'm aiming to be situated in an academic medical center so that I might teach, spend time with patients, and give public presentations on keeping the heart of compassion beating in the medical industry. 
Other specific interesting things about yourself/your family that you’d like to share:
I was raised Catholic-ish. I went to a college prep school where I succeeded in sleeping through the majority of my classes. I was woken up in college. My family is not religious, though my mother will come to church with me on occasion. My dad is done with organized religion. Their professional lives have been in hospitals. They met in Salt Lake because of the world famous slopes.

Do you have a favorite quote or motto that you like, which guides your life?
 EE Cummings, Mary Oliver, Rumi, and Cornel West are often rattling around in my frontal lobe.
What first brought you to the First Unitarian Church of Salt Lake?
The wine. I stayed for the social justice.

What does First Church mean to you/how does it enrich your life? 
First church is a weekly reorientation to the infinite possibilities of love. The First Church is a place for spiritual and intellectual development. The First Church is connection to community.

How do you participate in the church? 
Discombobulatedly- a new word that must exist. I sing in the choir when I show up on time. I've been writing essays alongside the wonderful Carol Romagosa. I've been participating here and there with the young adult group.

Why did you decide to sign the book? (officially become a member) 
I heard it was the only way I could keep getting wine at social gatherings without feeling guilty. At least Unitarians won't send me to hell. The real reason is that I feel refreshed for life when I sit in the pews for a service. I'm also in love with the socially-conscious progressivism that characterizes Unitarian history. I'm a lyrical dissenter on the fallible quest for unarmed truth. I'm seeking to be more than simply a dissenter; I'm seeking to be a compassionate agent of change in the world.

Do you pledge, if so, why?
 I do when I'm not in the red myself. I pledge for all the reasons you've pulled from my previous answers. If I didn't pledge, how would we get the wine?

Recycle with Environmental Ministry
-submitted by Judy Lord, Environmental Ministry

Environmental Ministry is still participating in four Terracycle recycling brigades. We collect a number of things, most of which are not recyclable through the city or county recycling programs. Then we send them to Terracycle, and the church receives a check paying us 2¢ for each item. Here are lists for those of you unsure just what things we collect:

Oral care products packaging: Any brand of toothpaste tubes and caps, toothbrushes, toothpaste cartons, toothbrush outer packaging, and floss containers. Sorry, no electric toothbrush parts are accepted.

Energy bar package recycling: Any brand of foil-lined energy bar wrappers; foil-lined granola bar wrappers; foil-lined meal replacement bar wrappers; foil-lined protein bar wrappers; foil-lined diet bar wrappers.

Cereal bags: Plastic cereal bags and box liners.

Personal care and beauty product packaging: Hair care packaging such as shampoo caps, conditioner caps, hair gel tubes and caps, hair spray triggers, and hair paste caps. Skin care packaging such as lip balm tubes and caps, soap dispensers and tubes, body wash caps, lotion dispensers and caps. Cosmetics packaging such as plastic lipstick cases, lip gloss tubes, mascara tubes, eye shadow cases, bronzer cases, foundation packaging, powder cases, eyeliner cases, eyeliner pencils, eye shadow tubes, concealer tubes, concealer sticks, and lip liner pencils.

We will also be collecting electronic waste for the YRUU’s at our table. (See article in the Religious Education section of this Torch.)

Now that you know what to bring in, find a corner or doorknob where you can place a bag for collecting these items. Then take them to the boxes and bins under the Environmental Ministry table. We plan to be here every Sunday except the weekend of the Art Fair, Celebration Sunday, and picnic Sunday, and we’ll be expecting you.

Here Comes the Swap!
-submitted by Judy Lord, Environmental Ministry

Everyone loves a swap, where people bring usable clothes, toys, etc. they no longer need and take away the treasures they find. Bring a lot – or nothing, and take a lot – or nothing. No money is involved.

Our pre-holiday swap will be held Saturday, November 5, at our sister church, San Esteban Episcopal, at 4615 So. 3200 West in West Valley. As we did last year, we will be collecting items here at the church Saturday morning, 8-10, and setting up the swap at San Esteban for noon-4 that afternoon. Remember, our congregation is invited to go to the swap, too. Start now collecting items to be passed on.

Supporting Standing Rock: a fundraiser, a gathering, and a workshop; Fri, Nov 4, 2016, 7PM
Eliot Hall; Co-Sponsors: Beehive Design Collective
and Environmental Ministry
-submitted by Joan M. Gregory, Environmental Ministry

Join the Beehive Design Collective and Environmental Ministry as we co-sponsor this fundraiser, gathering, and workshop to support the ongoing water and land defenders at the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation.

The workshop will include a report back from Carol Saurveyor, who has been on the ground at Standing Rock. There will be a presentation of the Beehive’s narrative graphic, Mesoamérica Resiste, which will focus on the historical examples of indigenous resistance and resource extraction that represented in the graphic (more on this graphic and the Beehive Collective below). The presenters will tie this history back to the current struggle in so-called North Dakota, and the group will break out to discuss how these issues affect local communities, and what can be done to address them.

The Beehive is an all-volunteer swarm of educators, artists, and activists using images to communicate and educate about the complex realities of our times. The dizzyingly detailed, hand-drawn, large-format posters and banners they tour with are portable murals that come alive through storytelling, illuminating how single issues are interconnected and part of bigger systems. Join in as the Bees deconstruct often overwhelming global issues in an engaging and interactive presentation, using metaphors from the natural world to connect social and environmental struggles.

Mesoamérica Resiste is the final installment in a trilogy of graphics about corporate globalization and militarization in the Americas. With this project the Bees’ strive to go beyond illustrating only the bad news to also sharing stories of grassroots organizing, collective action, and inspiration. The story begins with exploring the legacy of colonialism, connecting that history to today’s industrial development plans and resource extraction. The rest of the graphic documents many examples of resistance and alternatives to these top-down plans, especially organizing led by Indigenous peoples. Celebrating the ecological diversity of Mesoamerica is also a goal of this graphics campaign, with a cast of characters that includes over 400 species of insects, animals, and plants.

Oil pipelines, resource extraction and climate change affect us all. Right now, Standing Rock is at the frontlines of these issues, and they are leading the way in fighting back, for all of us. Indigenous organizers are drawing from their roots to show us another way of resisting dirty industry and corporate greed, a way that is not rooted in the non-profit industrial complex, but in the grassroots, in prayer, in intersectionality, and in a dream for a better world. All people of conscience must support the water and land defenders at Standing Rock, by organizing in their own communities and raising funds for the front line. All of the donations and honorariums that we receive from this tour, after our small overhead for gas and supplies are covered, will go directly to those on the ground at Standing Rock, to help them fortify for the winter and continue the work into the future.

The Women’s Sacred Circle was set up around 5 years ago. There are several activities we enjoy throughout the year. We meet in the Haven at First Unitarian Church on the 2nd Tuesday of each month to explore our spiritual journeys. We also meet each month on the full moon at members’ homes. This year we will be studying herbs and plants; their healing properties, culinary aspects, or how to create gardens of delight. In addition, twice a year we schedule retreats to Southern Utah to recreate our souls.

As a further extension of our activities, we create feminine hygiene bags for the agencies helping women in need. With the donations from several members and friends, we collect the needed items and distribute them. Past recipients have been: The Road Home, Christmas Box House, and The Inn Between. Currently, we are accepting donations to help with a United Way project for Kearns High School teens.

At this year’s planning meeting in September, we decided the direction our group will take. Using as our theme ‘HerStory’, we will focus on women’s stories that inform us about the Divine Feminine; ourselves; and the world. For example, we will take stories from myths, legends, and historical female figures from various cultures; and learn how to live our core values, and become change agents of our time.
For more information feel free to contact us at

• Leaving the country if Trump wins? The Refugee Resettlement Committee is offering pre-election, radical decluttering. Rid your house of furniture in anticipation of your exile in Costa Rica or Canada. Act now and avoid the rush! Call Joe Dubray at (904) 527-9773. Use the code: “Trumped."

• The Open Minds Book Group meets on the fourth Thursday of the month at 7:00 p.m. in the Haven Room at the Church. The book for October 27th is “Homecoming” by Yaa Gyasi. All are welcome.

• The Social Justice Council is co-sponsoring a film with Utahns for Just Peace in the Holy Land on October 21st at 7 pm in Eliot Hall . "Budrus" is a true story, of a small village which fights the Israeli military when the separation wall is planned to be built on the olive groves which have been owned and farmed by the Palestinians for generations. One family, father and fifteen year old daughter, organize the villagers in their opposition. The daughter leads the women of the village into action. Although the film isn't rated it would probably be PG 13, however, there is violence. The Israeli army beats unarmed villagers. Please join us for this interesting film followed with a discussion.

• UU Highway Cleanup: Just above beautiful Little Dell Reservoir, between East, Emigration, and Parley's Canyons, a sign proudly proclaims that the Salt Lake Unitarian Universalist Congregation is responsible for keeping this lovely area free of litter. Won't you join us for a few hours to take a nice walk and pick up a little trash? Saturday, October 29th, we will meet at the church at 0900, then proceed to the UDOT station East of Mt Dell golf course in Parley's Canyon. You can meet us there at 0930 if you like. If you are considering coming, please text your phone # and email to Todd Seymour (801) 783-7837, so I can email a reminder, and get an idea of who will join us. If you decide last minute and surprise us at the UDOT station, we'll be happy to see you. If you can confirm you are coming the night before, I'll definitely sleep better. : )

• Dinner and Dialogue Have you heard about DINNER AND DIALOGUE? It’s a great way to socialize and meet new members and friends outside of the traditional church setting. Participants gather in small groups and share a meal together in one home. You may sign up as a HOST where you set the date, time and the menu and decide how many guests you can accommodate. Or you may choose to sign up as a GUEST where you will attend and contribute by bringing a dish to share (appetizer, salad, dessert, beverage, etc. assigned by the host). Either way you choose to participate, you are guaranteed to make new FRIENDS! Our goal is to have a couple of these each month.I will coordinate by getting the guest names to the host and assisting in any way possible. There will be a table set up at our Activities Fair on September 18 so you can sign up or ask questions if you wish. After that, we will have our Dinner and Dialogue book at the Congregational Life Table in Eliot Hall for the remainder of the year. If you are unable to sign up to participate in Dinner and Dialogue at our church service or have questions, feel free to contact me, Darlene Thayne, at 801-455-6553 or send an email to . I have gotten to know some very lovely people through this activity. Why not give it a try?

• Mindfulness Group Every Sunday, meditation is offered as a time to pause, practice calming our thoughts and setting an intention to be mindful in our daily life. Guidance for developing meditation practice is shared along with suggested websites and reading. Alone, together helps to stay with the intention and to learn the benefits of being mindfully aware. 9:45 am to 10:30 in the Parlor. All are welcome.

• UU Lunch Bunch A family-friendly group for anyone and everyone who would like to get together for lunch and chat with like-minded people. Meet at the Restaurant on Sundays at noon during the summer. For more information contact Sonia Carnell at (801) 262-1151 or .
  

  October 9: The Copper Kitchen (4640 South 2300 East)
  October 16: Indochine (230 South 1300 East)
  October 23: The Rye Restaurant (230 South 1300 East)
  October 30: Kathmandu II (212 South 700 East)

The Caring Network of First Unitarian Church is hosting a workshop on “Caring for Persons Under Stress” (Yourself Included!); led by Rev. Harold Straughn on Saturday, November 5 from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. in Eliot Hall

BRING:

• Your pre-K to K kids! Child care will be provided.
• Your own brown bag lunch and drink.

The upcoming holiday season can be the most stressful time of the year.

• Some feel stress because they are experiencing the celebrations without a deceased loved one.
• Others struggle with family conflicts such as religious and political differences.
• Most of all, even the fun times mean juggling the special events along with home and work commitments.

Rev. Straughn, director of the Caring Network, is an expert in the resources available to persons under stress, including Active Listening, Social and Spiritual Conversations, and Guided Meditation. Each of these topics will be part of the workshop.

If you want to accept this invitation, send the word “Workshop,” and your name, to this email address: .